A Geek's Guide to Surviving the Swine Flu
Tuesday, July 21, 2009 at 10:05PM
Photo by StéfanWhilst the headlines grew bigger and more dramatic, many of us eased up on our worries about the coming swine flu pandemic. But the World Health Organization didn't. A flu pandemic from H1N1 is coming this fall. Even though it's not the Spanish Flu all over again, it looks like we are in for a bit of a rough season.
All types of influenza might be lethal to those with a weak respiratory system due to other illnesses, but for the most part it will be "just" another flu, but H1N1 might be the worst flu you've ever had.
The consequences might be huge per country. Not because of the high death toll, but because so many of us are home in bed, not being productive. Therefore it might be a good thing to be a bit prepared for the swine flu or any upcoming flu season.
So here is a Geek's Guide to Surviving the Swine Flu:
First of all you would want to avoid getting the flu in the first place. The two standard rules of infection control applies:
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Maintain good hygiene.
Influenza spreads between humans through coughing or sneezing and people touching something with the virus on it and then touching their own nose or mouth. So wash your hands often with soap and water. and keep those gel, alcohol hand rubs around at all times. Alcohol will help killing both virus and bacteria.
Mind surfaces touched by others.The virus can survive in human body fluids left on surfaces. So try to avoid touching stuff you don't have to. Do not use public computers at the office, do not rub your hands all over the meeting room table and then rest your head in them, no matter how boring the meeting is. Stay alert. But keep the spraying of disinfectants in the office environment to a minimum when your colleges are watching you. You are already the local geek, no need to become the nerd. -
Keep your distance.
When the flu appears in your area, close contact with others. Work from home. Stay away from gatherings of people.
According the 3M, the manufacturer of face masks there are no"established exposure limits for biological agents". So those surgical masks might not do the trick. But CDC has advised the usage of masks for those working in close contact with patients, and close contact being defined as 1 meter or less. So at least stay away from those close talkers at the office then. A bonus for you right there!
But even if we all try our best to prevent a pandemic, it might happen. Here is a list of what you should prepare in case the pandemic hits us hard this fall or winter, and you have to stay isolated, or worse, fall ill:
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Make arrangements with your employer for a home office solution.
Avoid the office bug. Make sure your employer has a VPN setup or some way you can securely connect to your workplace so that you might keep working from from the safety of your own home. The best way in my opinion is being able to reach your workstation through a remote desktop connection right from your personal computer at home.
You should inform your employer that this might be a good thing to plan for now, because in order to prevent the entire staff from being away with the flu, they might make them work from home if an outbreak starts. Thus preventing them from becoming sick, whilst they maintain productivity from their home office.
Who knows, you might finally be able to convince your boss to buy you a new PC and pay for that DSL upgrade you wanted. -
Keep a good supply of healthy meals in the freezer.
If you come down with the flu you want to have replaced all those crappy frozen pizzas you throw back, whilst playing World of Warcraft, with healthy nutritious meals. Visit your high-end supermarket and stock a good supply of traditional, nutritious meals, that might be prepared easily. You will need them to maintain your strength and provide your body with the best in order to keep that immune system up and running. While you are at it, start eating healthy from now on. -
Setup ways for automatic payment of your regular bills.
Depends on the country you live in, but most banks have ways of automatically paying those regular bills from you account. Make sure the bills from you ISP, cell phone provider, TV company and electricity are paid automatically. You do not want to loose Internet connection, power or TV because you can gather the strength to get out of bed in order to pay them. Online gaming, Facebook and reruns of LOST might be your only source of comfort in times of illness. -
Rebuild that relationship with your mum.
I know you don't call her much, because you are tired of the nagging about not having a girlfriend yet, because you spend all that time in front of the computer, generally not understanding what you do for a living. But in times of crisis (i.e. you being sick as hell) a caring mother start seeming like a good idea.
So start calling her regularly on weekends again, listen with interest to her ranting and ravings. You can always start call screening again when the WHo says the pandemic is over. -
Avoid traveling.
This might hurt a bit. Not going to your favorite comic con or role-playing convention this fall might feel like a huge sacrifice. So as a comfort treat yourself to a new online role playing game subscription and search for those rare 1st edition comics on eBay for the time being. Make sure your online purchases are delivered to your home, and avoid the crowds at the post office. -
Avoid snuggling your date.
If you should be so lucky as to have a date in the first place, put the intimacy on hold. She might still be contagious in her first 5 days of illness, but not yet noticeably sick. So keep your distance during the date, and give her a quick handshake good night. And when she doesn't notice, rub your hands with that alcohol gel.
Or just avoid meeting those online dates IRL, and instead, stay home and read "The Game" by Neil Strauss over and over during winter. Then come out as Mr. Ladies man next spring, and pick up a super model when everything is safe again. (Buy "The Game" at Amazon.com or as audiobook on iTunes) -
Stockpile remedies for easing flu symptoms.
Having the flu is bad. The body aches, fever rises, and you are coughing and sneezing. But us geeks know a bit about boosting a bit of extra energy, after all those late night gaming and programming sessions.
So keep a good supply of Red Bull or similar in the fridge at all times. Those will always pick you up a bit. But you probably have the fridge half full already.
Buy a Nespresso Coffee maker. You can keep this on your night stand and refill with water every trip to the bathroom. Fill the drawer with coffee pods. Available at www.nespresso.com.
Aspirin is not recommended during Influenza sickness, but any other drug to keep the fever at a temperature below nuclear is a must.
Tamiflu and Relenza actually does work in order to reduce the effect of the Swine Flu but those might be hard to get. Trying to buy them online might backfire a bit. You can always try getting some from your doctor when flu season hits us, but you might not get it before you actually fall ill. And remember - hacking his computer making those subscriptions for yourself, is frowned upon!
Like before mentioned, alcohol works well on killing viruses on surfaces. Even though it doesn't work as a part of your immune system, a strong drink might kill those viruses in your mouth on the way down your throat. If not, a nice whiskey might at least sooth you a bit, after that one and a half hour one-way phone conversation with your mother.
All in all one might suggest that geeks might come out on top of a world wide flu pandemic. Those who socializing mostly online, plays online games instead of going to the gym, mostly shops online and has a Facebook relationship status of "Single" might be the ones best fit to avoid the Swine Flu.
How does that passage go? "The geek shall inherit the earth"?
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